“What did I do to deserve being called ‘too much’? You said you were anxious, so I provided a solution. What is the problem?”
Sa-yoon stared at him with genuine bewilderment. Han Geon-joo’s dark eyes swirled with complex emotions. He opened his mouth as if to argue, then shut it, sighed with an air of resignation, and buried his face in his arms.
“…I’m too tired to talk. Just knock me out.”
“You are seriously the most back-and-forth brat I have ever met.”
“Is that a compliment?”
“Does it sound like one?”
“No, but I’ll take it as one.”
Sa-yoon snorted at the shameless reply, grabbed Geon-joo’s head, and pulled him close.
“Then sleep for a bit.”
He pressed a pressure point with his fingertips, and Geon-joo went limp almost instantly. Sa-yoon watched the man whose beauty shone brightest when asleep, checking the time. About five minutes passed. He nudged Geon-joo’s toe with his own.
“It’s about time you came out. Stop pretending and wake up.”
“Caught me?”
“You think I don’t know this body?”
He had long since memorized every minor physical reaction. Noticing a shift in breathing rhythm was child’s play. He stated it calmly, and the man opened his eyes, golden irises gleaming. Sa-yoon yawned loudly and waved a hand.
“I trust you heard everything from inside. Let’s wrap this up quickly.”
He rose slowly, dragging a chair over to sit. Sitting on the bed would have been more comfortable, but he knew Geon-joo would throw a fit later, so he forced his tired body to move. The golden-eyed man gauged the distance between them and chuckled.
“Isn’t that a bit far?”
“Think about what you did, you bastard. This is the appropriate distance.”
“If I knew it would be like this, I should have been more passionate back then.”
“Is he insane?”
His incredulity spilled out unfiltered. The man didn’t hide his amusement at the raw curse, laughing heartily. Sa-yoon stared at him with utter incomprehension, tapping his foot.
“Let me ask you one thing. Why did you kiss me?”
Sa-yoon was usually sensitive to affection directed at him. Especially if that affection was deep enough to encompass ‘sacrifice’. Perhaps because his life had been so fraught with misfortune, he had learned to recognize such affection whether he wanted to or not.
Just as he had seen in Han Geon-joo’s eyes in the collapsed auction house.
But he didn’t feel that same affection from the golden-eyed man. It was clear the man held feelings beyond mere goodwill, but was it grand enough to warrant self-sacrifice? No.
In short, he didn’t love Sa-yoon.
So why kiss him?
It was a question that had sprouted after watching Han Geon-joo kiss him again in retaliation, as if erasing another man’s mark. He stared intently, waiting for an answer. The man shrugged. Perhaps uncomfortable being bound, he glanced at the ropes on his wrists, then shifted to lean back against the headboard. Sa-yoon watched him silently.
Eyes met in the quiet room. The man’s answer came only after a long silence.
“Maybe I wanted to leave something behind?”
“What kind of nonsense is that?”
“Why is it nonsense? Think about it. The person I wanted to see is already gone, their life ended. You, their reincarnation, share their aura, but you aren’t them. Don’t you think I’d be lonely? In that situation, being suddenly summoned just to fulfill a duty I unknowingly took on and then leaving… it feels unfair. Maybe I just wanted to leave my mark on you. You are, after all, the only link connecting me to that person.”
In short, he did it out of terrible, lingering attachment.
Sa-yoon clicked his tongue, dumbfounded.
“For a dead guy, you sure have a lot of lingering regrets about your past life.”
“It’s because I’m not a living being, but a will. Without a body, what else is left?”
“I don’t get it, but I’ll pretend I do. So, if you did it just because you were sad to leave, you have no regrets now, right?”
“It’s a bit disappointing to hear that after getting only one kiss.”
“Be satisfied before I call a shaman to exorcise you, you bastard.”
Do you know how wronged I felt, getting looked at like the world’s worst trash because of that one kiss?
Sa-yoon scowled, then after gauging the timing, brought up the main business.
“By now, you must have figured everything out. I’ve granted everything you wanted, so let go of your regrets and get lost.”
“You said you’d put a period, but this feels more like ripping out the page.”
“So what? As long as it’s a period in my book.”
“So violent. Unlike that child.”
“And you’re gloomy, unlike Han Geon-joo.”
“Wow, being compared really feels bad.”
With every exchange, he wondered what he was doing. Feeling like he was constantly being swept up by Han Geon-joo’s past self, Sa-yoon sighed and pressed his temples to soothe his headache.
“Overturning the board like you wanted, I decided to do that. And you’ve taught Han Geon-joo enough, so leave now. You’ve fulfilled your duty, so you don’t have any power left anyway. Isn’t that why you can’t even untie a single rope?”
“Sharp.”
There was no way a former deity would be bound by a rope made of mere items if he had power. When he first appeared, he had been threatening and aloof enough to subdue Abaddon with a single finger. That dangerous, spine-chilling aura was largely absent from the man now. Confirmed in his suspicion, the man scoffed and leaned his head back against the bed.
“You’re right. I’ve exhausted most of my power. I could disappear right now if I wanted. Or I could stay in this body for a while and offer advice whenever the owner uses his power.”
“I don’t need that, so just go.”
“It would be more helpful if I stayed.”
“Your presence hinders his growth. Realizing power and improving skill is more valuable and skillful when done purely by one’s own will.”
“I thought you cherished him, but you’re cold-hearted.”
“I have to raise him, even if it means being cold-hearted.”
That way, he’ll do well on his own when I’m gone.
He barely swallowed the words that almost slipped out. Even though he seemed to be talking to the golden-eyed man, Han Geon-joo was likely listening from inside, so he couldn’t speak carelessly. The man hummed for a moment, then blinked.
“Hmm. The calculation doesn’t add up.”
“What doesn’t?”
“I’m only doing good things for you guys before leaving. Shouldn’t I get something out of this too?”
“You have it, bastard. Your long-cherished wish, I’m fulfilling it.”
“That’s not enough.”
“Then what do you want?”
“Let me see that child. Then I think I can disappear without regrets.”
“…What?”
Is he crazy?
Stunned for a moment, Sa-yoon let out a deep sigh from his dantian and touched his forehead.
“You mean you want to meet my past life?”
“Yes.”
“How am I supposed to do that?”
He didn’t have a will residing in his divine power like Han Geon-joo. He scolded him with his eyes for talking nonsense, but the man laughed.
“You can. Because you also have a dormant will.”
“…?”
“You heard it from your Original Soul, didn’t you? How to awaken your power.”
Fuck.
He brought up the worry Sa-yoon had barely managed to erase. Sa-yoon’s expression hardened as he recalled his Original Soul‘s words: that the person who loved him would die for him, and that would be when he regained his power.
“For a moment, when your power awakens, your will is also awaken. It won’t be long like mine, but even that brief moment is enough. So call me back then. Until then, I’ll live as if dead. I promise on the name of a god.”
The pressure he thought had completely disappeared slowly seeped out.
A promise on the name of a god.
Having heard from the God of Wisdom about the binding force of such a promise, Sa-yoon sighed and wiped his face with his hand.
“Then compromise properly with Han Geon-joo. Refrain from helping when he uses skills, but if that bastard tries to turn into a snake, stop him.”
Since he couldn’t send him to heaven right now, what could he do? In this situation, he had to use what he could.
The golden-eyed man, willing to accept the bold demand, stared piercingly at Sa-yoon.
“What.”
“Even if I disappear, the promise we made is eternal. Do you understand what that means? It means the fact that I will help you in your grand defiance by your side will not change.”
“…?”
Unable to grasp the meaning, Sa-yoon tilted his head. The man smiled refreshingly and moved his lips. The words, conveyed only by the shape of his mouth, embedded themselves in Sa-yoon’s eyes.
‘I’ve given you enough hints. It’s up to you to take them.’
Hint?
As Sa-yoon’s eyes widened in question, the man, lifting the corners of his mouth gently, continued.
“Then, as promised, I’ll go make a rough compromise with the owner of this body. Once the compromise is over, the kid you were waiting for will wake up again. I’ll keep my promise, so you keep yours.”
“…”
“See you next time, little sun.”
With curved eyes, the man closed them. Sa-yoon chewed on the man’s words in the room where silence had suddenly descended.
The promise does not change. I will help you in your grand defiance by your side.
“If I listen to that bastard, this seems to be the hint…”
Retracing the previous conversation to understand the context, Sa-yoon suddenly turned around with a hardened face at a thought that flashed through his mind.
“It’s not Han Geon-joo.”
The person who would die for him wasn’t Han Geon-joo.
“Jongsik-ah…”
Kim Jongsik.
Like a pull, the name that rose to his lips without awareness gave him goosebumps. Sa-yoon shuddered, then frantically opened the door and ran toward the basement where the executives would be gathered.