Chapter 231

“Why?”

Nathan stared blankly up at Azar as he asked.

“Just… I suddenly had that thought.”

After pausing briefly as if organizing his thoughts, Azar hesitantly continued.

“Nathan, this is a secret… The royal family has a story that’s been passed down for generations. It contained details somewhat more specific than the prophecy known to the public.”

He had forgotten about it all this time. It was a memory he had pushed aside at some point, as tumultuous events had followed in rapid succession after that incident—Elphinesse collapsing from poison, himself gaining holy power, and so on.

“I don’t remember exactly how old I was, but when I was young… there was just one time I secretly followed my sister.”

However, when he first entered the dungeon, Azar had remembered that incident.

‘It must be because of the sacred relic.’

When the sacred relic spoke to him through dreams, Azar didn’t forget the fragments of memory he had seen, even after waking. And he gradually realized that it wasn’t just a dream, but something he had actually experienced as a child. But at the time, he only thought, ‘Oh right, that did happen.’ Though he felt something was strange, he simply dismissed it as unimportant. So it quickly faded from his memory.

He had completely forgotten about it until he was summoned before the king after the new oracle was delivered. But when the sacred relic emitted light and people called him the prophesied hero, Azar recalled that memory once again.

“…Around that time, the detached palace was quite boring. So my daily routine was secretly wandering around various parts of the royal palace. That’s what I was doing then too. I found a hole in the wall that someone had made, used it to get to another building, and discovered my sister hurrying somewhere with an adult I’d never seen before. Curious, I unconsciously followed them in secret.”

Azar chuckled softly, saying that when he came to his senses, he was already following Elphinesse, as if he had been entranced—looking back now, it was strange.

“…I remember it was quite deep inside. It was a long corridor I’d never seen before, unlike the detached palace where I stayed—it was ornate and grand. One wall of the corridor was completely lined with portraits, and since they all had blonde hair and blue eyes, I think they were portraits of past kings.”

Strangely, they didn’t encounter anyone else on the way there. So it clearly wasn’t a place just anyone could enter. Well, thanks to that, he was able to follow his sister without interruption…

“And there, I overheard something unexpected.”

Azar continued in his usual voice, saying that he had secretly eavesdropped on the story the king was telling his sister, hiding behind a display cabinet.

“This fate begins the moment one receives that name.”

His hand, which had been playing with the dull red hair, gradually slowed and then stopped.

“…That’s what the king said.”

And what followed was truly remarkable, Azar said with just a smile. Not realizing how Nathan might feel listening to the story unfolding so matter-of-factly.

“It was like a story written about the future. I’m sure quite a lot was said back then, but now I only remember that I heard such a story, so there are only a few things I recall clearly, you know?”

Azar shrugged as he said this.

“Besides, actually, the king and I made eye contact midway through, so I ran away while eavesdropping and didn’t hear it all. On top of that, my sister caught me afterward and scolded me. For the first time, she got angry, asking what I thought I was doing following her to such a place. Afterward, she apologized though…”

Not knowing what she was so sorry about, Elphinesse hugged and comforted the young Azar while repeatedly apologizing. And she explained that what he had seen was a secret passed down through the royal family, a secret space shown only to the successor designated by the current king, and if this became known, they would be in danger—so he must never reveal this to anyone, and should pretend he hadn’t seen anything, just forget it entirely.

“My sister wouldn’t know. She wouldn’t dream that I would remember this. I was very young then. Most memories from that age are forgotten as one grows older, right?”

Even Azar himself had forgotten until the sacred relic brought it back to mind.

“So what I want to say is… looking back now, the story the king told then resembles my life quite closely. While not exactly the same, there were many similarities.”

As the king had said, the winter of his 17th year became more severe, and an anomaly occurred in the north. The prediction that the world would be thrown into chaos and turmoil in his 20th year was realized, though the timing was a bit accelerated, and then…

‘At last, the hero will make his name known to the world.’

That prophecy too, eventually came true, didn’t it?

“…So I suddenly thought: that ‘name’ the king spoke of back then—what if it really was my name? And thinking about it that way, I vaguely began to understand the sense of dissonance I’d felt throughout my life.”

So Azar couldn’t help but realize.

“I think that’s why I knew. That I had to go then, that perhaps I had lived until then for that very purpose. And besides…”

Azar paused and glanced at Nathan. He had been quiet for a while, so Azar wondered if he might be asleep. Looking at Nathan lying with his eyes closed, Azar gently asked:

“…Are you asleep?”

“…”

“Are you really sleeping?”

“…”

When Nathan remained silent even after being called softly, Azar sighed once, thinking he must really be asleep, and lay down looking at the ceiling.

He wasn’t sure how much Nathan had heard before falling asleep. It felt somewhat deflating.

“…”

After staring blankly at the ceiling for a moment, Azar spoke in a greatly reduced voice.

“…You know. I’ve never told anyone this, but when I was young, my only wish was to live safely with my sister in that old detached palace. I didn’t want anything else. But the world didn’t seem to like that about me.”

Azar continued with a slightly melancholic tone.

“Do you know when I first manifested holy power? It was when my sister collapsed before me after eating a muffin I gave her. I still vividly remember that day. That muffin—I had received it from the queen. She had placed it in my hand with a kind smile, saying I was pretty… I had no idea it contained poison and just thought I should give it to my sister since she liked them.”

Azar spoke self-deprecatingly, saying he constantly regretted not taking even a single bite first.

“I gave poison to my sister. If I’d known it was poison, I would have eaten it myself.”

If his holy power hadn’t manifested at that moment, what would have happened? Just the thought was horrifying, making Azar grimace.

“…I told my sister I never did, but the truth is, I did resent her at times. I can’t count how many times I thought it would have been better if she had abandoned me. If she had given up on me, wouldn’t she have been more comfortable? Wouldn’t she have avoided getting hurt or threatened because of me?”

Gently taking Nathan’s hand and interlacing their fingers, Azar murmured quietly, “…Perhaps dying back then would have been better for everyone.”

But even with such thoughts, he had never willingly given up on life. That’s why he occasionally thought:

‘Looking back, I seem to have been quite attached to life.’

Even when on the verge of death, he wanted to live, and so he lived, and ultimately survived. While his desire for life was largely due to his only sister, he suddenly thought that it might also be because of something someone had once said to him.

‘Survive.’

It was like a curse. Who was it that had said that to him?

‘Climb over the lives of others, struggle to stand, and prolong your life.’

When he thought about it, his life had been exactly like that.

Azar suddenly recalled a winter day in the snowy mountains. The day he had desperately survived and ruined someone else’s life. He squeezed the hand he had unconsciously grabbed, while his other hand irritably brushed at his eyes.

‘…I can’t keep this secret for long.’

He needed to speak about what happened then, to tell him what he had realized… but the words wouldn’t come. In the end, what escaped his parted lips was different from his thoughts.

“…Here I am saying all sorts of things next to someone who’s stupidly sleeping.”

Azar smiled bitterly and rubbed his face with his dry hand.

“You know, honestly, I wanted to do as my sister said. Although it’s already too late…”

And he muttered with a sigh:

“Should I just give up here?”

Suddenly, a response came. Nathan, whom he thought was asleep, replied with his eyes still closed. His voice didn’t have any trace of drowsiness typical of someone who had just awakened. Startled, Azar half-raised his upper body and looked down at Nathan.

“…Weren’t you sleeping?”

“I was just organizing my thoughts for a moment.”

Despite saying this, Nathan kept his eyes closed. Azar, feeling somewhat embarrassed for having said strange things under the influence of the dawn atmosphere, poked Nathan’s cheek lightly. As Nathan gently furrowed his brow, Azar moved his finger to gently smooth out the wrinkled forehead, then said flatly:

“…Then you heard everything.”

“Yes.”

“That’s mean.”

Only then did Nathan slowly open his eyes and gaze at Azar. With a slightly sullen face, Azar met his gaze.

“Azar, do you want to give it all up now?”

Azar was momentarily shaken, as if hearing something unexpected. But soon he smiled, saying what a sweet suggestion that was. With playfully upturned lips and habitually crinkled eyes, he said:

“…Should I?”

With the flickering fire too bright to look at, he lowered his gaze and uttered a half-hearted truth.

“Shall we go somewhere quiet, somewhere no one knows, and live together?”

But immediately he smiled broadly as if it were all a joke.

“…Just kidding.”

“Alright.”

“I was just being childish… huh?”

“Let’s do that.”

Blue eyes trembled wildly like flames in the wind. Meeting that gaze, Nathan calmly said:

“Come with me, Azar.”

A pale hand gently caressed his cheek.